To My Househusband: ‘What You Provide To This Family Is So Much More Than What Money Can Buy’

Dear househusband,

It’s been around seven months since you quit your job.

It’s been around seven months since I didn’t have to worry much about your safety in the “outside world.”

It was especially more nerve wracking since you worked in the hospital. You weren’t in the frontlines, but you were close enough. I remember how exhausted you were when you got home and you needed to take a bath and disinfect everything first instead of being able to just relax and be with us already.

The stress was not worth it, and I knew it was better for us if you resign.

Since then, we decided that you’ll stay home and focus on taking care of the house and our son. Sabi mo nga, regular employee ka na as househusband and stay-at-home dad. I wish I could say, “These past few months have not been easy but worth the hardships.”

However, it actually was an “easy” time for me, looking at the big picture.

I never thought I would be our breadwinner at one point, but it turned out to be the best few months of our family life for me.

You took on all the house chores like they were no big deal.

Thank you for keeping our home clean and comfortable. I’ve been working-from-home since 2019. It was in 2021 (when you started staying at home) that my “office” (our house) was the most maaliwalas. Our child’s toys and messes aside, thank you for making sure that everything was organized and all the clutter tidied up.

Thank you for doing the laundry, doing the groceries, and preparing our meals. I know a lot of women will think I’m lucky for those alone. But there was so much more.

You took pride in taking care of our child.

Thank you for being our two-year-old son’s primary caregiver. You were so hands-on with him–quite literally, since he only eats full meals when you use your hands to feed him. Spoiled kid!

Thank you for making sure he got his vitamins and that he was growing right for his age. Thank you for teaching him random lessons and sharing the joys with me. Thank you for soothing him when he’s fussy and making him laugh until he gets tired.

Remember the first time he said, “Dad’s funny!”? And that time he was able to read the words you spelled on his whiteboard? Those are memories I will cherish forever.

Thank you for doing all these despite your bad back.

I know it hurts whenever you strain it too much, which usually happens when you need to carry our son around all day. I know it could hurt even worse when you couldn’t exercise because you’re busy with him or the house.

And I know there were times you wanted to take your long bike rides, but you chose to stay home for our safety or to take care of him. I’m really sorry I couldn’t help you much, but thank you for always assuring me that you want to do it for us.

You made sure I can focus on work and tolerated my moods as much as you can.

Thank you for allowing me to focus on work whenever our son is being clingy. Honestly, I would’ve loved to give him my attention, but there were times I felt I really needed to deliver at work.

Thank you because I didn’t have to ask you or complain or anything. You knew it right away and took it upon yourself to help lighten my load.

Thank you for that because it allowed me to excel and after the work was done, I was able to spend quality time with you two.

Thank you for understanding me when I’m grumpy.

Before, it was just when I had PMS, but now it happens almost all month long except for one golden week!

I’m sorry I can’t help but get annoyed at you a lot of times.

Thank you for being patient with me, even more so because I know our toddler stretches our patience already. And thank you for your warm hugs and kisses whenever I’m becoming a momster. Those are my favorite parts of being in extended quarantine together.

You saved and helped earn money as much as you can.

Thank you for the sacrifices you made in order to save some cash. I keep urging you to buy new briefs and shirts, but you stick with your ragged, bacon clothes because you know new ones are expensive.

Thank you for doing weekly meal preps for us, so we didn’t have to order in as much as before. And thank you for last Christmas, when you spent hours and hours baking banana bread and selling them. More so, you even bought me a gift–a mini skincare set!–with your profits.

You make me feel like the luckiest wife ever!

No joke–I can’t imagine my life without you.

Every day, you always make me feel loved and appreciated. Of course, there are times when we fight or unintentionally hurt each other. But thank you for always wanting to talk it out, make up, and hopefully become better next time. 

But more than the sorrys and thank yous, I want to say I’m so proud of you.

After more than half a year, you finally found a dream job. And you won’t need to leave the house just like me, so we can still take care of our son together!

You said that when you got the job offer, it felt like you passed the board exams all over again. I was so grateful, too, especially since I kept praying for it. I believe it’s what God wants for us, and I’m excited for the year ahead.

I’m so proud of the strong and dependable person you’ve become over the last 14+ years since we came to *really* know each other and the last almost-four years we’ve been married.

As that old Rico Blanco song goes, “You can thank the stars all you want, but I’ll always be the lucky one.”

Oh, and if you can’t tell by now, this tribute is because it’s that time of the year again. Happy Valentine’s Month, hubby! I love you!