This Parenting Approach Can Help You Finally Avoid Disciplining Your Child With Punishments

In the past few years, many parenting styles seem to be gaining popularity. While some moms and dads might not want to boil their approach to parenting to one specific style, some of these do offer ways that can help adults raise their kids into well-rounded adults. One such approach is Conscious Discipline.

What is Conscious Discipline?

Conscious Discipline is an “evidence-based, trauma-informed approach” to parenting that was created by child development expert Dr. Becky Bailey and designed to encourage parents to learn how they respond emotionally to their children so that they can stay present and connect with their kids.

In an article on Family Education, Heather Wallace, a coach and a mentor for positive parenting approaches, explains that Conscious Discipline involves the need for parents to “rethink discipline and control ourselves first before dealing with our child’s behavior. It takes a shift in mindset from how we were raised to think about discipline as punishment, to thinking of discipline as an opportunity to teach missing skills. Parents use the tools to gain control of their emotions and upset, and in turn, download that calm to their child.”

In other words, Conscious Discipline encourages adults to make changes in their lives first. By making these adjustments, they can facilitate better communication, help their kids deal with difficult emotions and situations without fear, and avoid reward- and punishment-based discipline.

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Principles of Conscious Discipline

According to the Conscious Discipline website, the approach is founded on the seven skills that parents need to turn discipline issues into opportunities to teach them the socio-emotional and communication skills they need to manage themselves, resolve conflict, prevent bullying, and develop pro-social behaviors.

These seven skills are composure, encouragement, assertiveness, choices, empathy, positive intent, and consequences. When children are taught to apply these consciously, they also learn values and life skills they will benefit from for the rest of their lives.

Benefits of Conscious Discipline

Parenting can be filled with lots of moments that leave moms and dads feeling frustrated and out of control or even doubtful of whether they are succeeding as parents, such as defiance, power struggles, physical aggression, and verbal attacks.

The good news is that the Conscious Discipline approach can help you deal with these situations. Family Education writes, “Conscious Discipline can take the frustration and feelings of powerlessness out of these everyday parenting moments and turn them into teachable moments instead.”

Bundoo also writes that the foundation of Conscious Discipline is to build a “connected family” where each member has a voice and each of their needs are met. When these connections are created, the child’s brain is wired for impulse control and she becomes more willing to cooperate, thus eliminating the need for rewards and punishments.

Would you ever try out the Conscious Discipline approach on your kids? Share your experience with us!

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