Why We Should Stop Asking, 'Kailan Mo Ipapasok Sa School Ang Anak Mo?'

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Just like the question, "Kailan niyo susundan ang anak ninyo?" carries pressure and anxiety, the same can be said for the question, "Kailan mag-aaral ang anak mo?"

Especially for first-time moms who are still trying to grasp the fact that their once tiny, fragile newborn will be out of the house for a few hours and will come home with a different scent after a long day at school.

During our last visit to the pediatrician in April, we were advised to enroll my 3-year-old this school year. "Dapat pagbalik niyo dito, nag-aaral na siya!" our doctor, who used to give my daughter her first dose of vaccines, emphasized.

Not to mention that this question is a common conversation starter, especially when people meet your toddler for the first time. They often ask, "Wow, nag-aaral na ba siya?" Don't worry, none of us are spared from this query, even Iya Villania herself gets asked this question by her very own mom quite often.

It's a wonder how time flies! One minute I was pinching my nipples for the first drops of the magical colostrum, and now I find myself trying to make a bento out of bread and eggs that will hopefully make my toddler smile and finish it.

Are we ready?

My husband and I discussed sending our daughter to school. We know she's ready—she knows her ABCs, can count from 1 to 20, and write her name—but are WE ready?

Sending her to school would mean waking her up, getting her dressed, preparing her breakfast, dropping her off and picking her up, and all that jazz. Who will do it? We both work from home, and eight hours is not enough to finish all our tasks. After all, pre-Kinder is not required by DepEd, right? And besides, I'm her best teacher, right?

We had all these excuses until I found a Montessori school near our home that offers a one-month summer camp for kids aged 3-5. Plus, the class schedule fits my break time. We enrolled at the last minute, and as of writing, my child is in her third week.

READ ALSO: Tuition Fee Guide: Quezon City Progressive And Montessori Preschools

Not easy

But it wasn't easy. The biggest struggle I had to overcome was learning how to drive. Because I chose a reputable school that's 4 kilometers away from our home, taking a GrabCar would cost us up to P400 a day. Today marked the first day I drove her alone to school. I felt like those soccer moms in movies who drive their kids to school. Since day 1, I've been waiting for her for two hours, and I use that time to do focused work.

"It's not easy, but it's fulfilling to see my child's eyes light up when she sees her new friends. It's heartwarming to hear her sing new songs that I didn't teach her."

Enrolling her in summer classes turned out to be a good idea after all. It prepares us for the commitment of doing this school thing for a year. It's not easy, but it's fulfilling to see my child's eyes light up when she sees her new friends. It's heartwarming to hear her sing new songs that I didn't teach her. It's satisfying to know that she is thriving, and I give myself a pat on the back for all the effort I put in as, although not the best, but her first teacher.

Saab Magalona recently shared that her son Pancho has been accepted into a regular school. Pancho has special needs, and it's absolutely understandable for Saab to feel skeptical about her son starting school. Like me and you, she had these excuses: "I almost lost him. Absolutely not." "He'll be safe if he's just at home." "What if something happens and I'm not there?"

She said it's probably because she had a birthing trauma that sending her son to school becomes a struggle. It made me realize even more where my anxieties are coming from. My daughter was born prematurely, and she spent 20 days in the hospital without me. From the day she came home with me, I never left her side. Maybe that's why, like Saab, I'm feeling this different kind of anxiety about entrusting my child again to other people, thinking that it makes me less of a parent if I'm not with her.

No need to rush

If you are also feeling this way, let Thumby Server-Veloso or Teacher Thumby, an early childhood educator and a member of the Smart Parenting Board of Experts, enlighten you on when you should enroll your kids in school.

As a school owner, Teacher Thumby said that when parents ask her if they should enroll their child already, she tells them that it depends on their goals, family dynamics, and the child's readiness. She emphasizes, "Young children benefit from high-quality early childhood programs, but if your child will be surrounded by siblings and family members who can play with your child, engage them in a lot of verbal interactions, and provide a stimulating home environment, then there is no need to rush to school."

However, if for now you rely on educational shows for your child to learn, Teacher Thumby reminds, "When the child learns by exploring things around them or when playing with other people, there's a back-and-forth dynamic that builds better pathways in the brain and helps more areas of development such as language, motor, social, emotional, and even cognitive."

The next time you are asked about when your child will go to school, take a deep breath and say, "Why? Are you going to pay for their tuition fees?"

Kidding aside, I hope you find the answer to the question and decide when your family is ready. Take your time. Life is not a race, after all.