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'Kapag Single Dad, Babaero? Kapag Married Mom, Walang Freedom?'
PHOTO BY DALE CAMANDANG, JIA LACSON
  • Whether you are a solo parent or married, or you decide to have just one child or multiple kids, people will always have something to say about you. Good or bad, we'll never know its impact until we experience it ourselves. 

    That's why, Smart Parenting started a new video series entitled 'Usap Tayo,' to create safe spaces to discuss difficult topics like parenting status, featuring real moms and dads. 

    In the pilot episode of Usap Tayo, we put three parents who are happily married, and three single parents together in a room.

    Their agenda: to discuss common misconceptions and stigma attached to each parenting status: are single dads irresponsible, and single moms desperate for love? Are married parents having less freedom, and even less "sexy time?"

    Members of the Smart Parenting Mom and Dad Squads shared their insights and even gave tips for all kinds of parents.

    Whatever phase or status you are in life right now, you can relate to these parents whose ultimate goal is to raise happy, healthy families.

    Watch the full video here:

    Every parent is unique

    Genina Domingo, an IT professional and a proud solo parent of 1 reveals, "Ever since I was 4 to 5 months pregnant, I got separated from the dad, and from there I decided to be a solo parent, rather than deal with a toxic relationship."

    She adds, "Siguro nung sa simula affected ka, kasi wala namang babae na nangarap na ay gusto ko maging single mom. Kasalanan ito ng Disney princesses!"

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    For Jia Lacson, an entrepreneur and mom of 1, "Married ako at 25, and then yung husband ko was 29. Younger ako, pero never kong na-feel na parang nakulong ako. Feeling ko nga ngayong married ako mas nakakalabas pa ako."

    The parents discussed the Solo Parent Act. Dale Camandang, a sales and marketing professional and solo parent of one said, "Parang hindi siya masyado applicable to all single parents, kulang din siya sa awareness." 

    Dreus Cosio, a motivational speaker and businessowner, said, "From a married person's perspective, totoo yun, may stigma talaga na pag solo parent, suddenly parang you have to defend yourself, "what happened?"

    Parents do everything for family

    Dreus also clarifies, "Marriage is not always equivalent to provision. Merong nagrereklamo, "Yung asawa ko ayaw mag-work."

    Epo Sindayen, a professional make-up artist and solo parent of one, "Hanggat may raket may budget. As a single mom, lahat ng raket, gagawin mo to provide."

    The parents agree that whether you are a solo parent or happily married, never judge anyone and respect everyone.

    Sarah Tanhuanco, a stay-at-home mom of 1 and is happily married stresses the importance of having time for yourself. "As couples, you have to respect each other din. If napansin ninyo na yung husband mo kailangan magkaroon ng me time, bigyan niyo. Pag kailangan mo, sabihin mo nalang din," she said.

    READ ALSO: Lumalabas Sa Isang Survey Na Mas May 'Me Time' Ang Mga Tatay Kaysa Sa Mga Nanay

    Parents need help, too

    Genina also shared what helps in her parenting journey. "Mahirap magpalaki ng bata ng mag-isa ka. Without someone to help you with financial, day-to-day activities. Pero I have a strong support system, my family, friends and of course sa community of moms and dads that help me along as well, and of course si Lord, a very prayerful life."

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    Dreus shared his realization, "Looking at both sides, never judge anyone. Everyone is just trying to live their own life."

    He adds, what we can do is to support each other. "Kamusta ka? How can we support each other? At the end of the day, family is family," he said.

    Solo parent or not, moms and dads are welcome to join the Smart Parenting Village, our official Facebook group. Start here.

    What other parents are reading

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